Posts Tagged ‘long distance relationship’

‘Malulungkot rin naman ako dun…’ James said over our dinner last night.
‘Eh bakit ka pa aalis?’ I asked the question which baffled me since learning of his decision.
‘For our future.’

It was in 2008 when James and I decided to explore opportunities abroad. Most of our seniors were working either in one of the tax haven islands or in the Middle East. James and I agreed that what we were looking for was for us to work in one city, even if for different companies, as long as we would still be together. I received offers in a city he did not receive any from. It happened the other way when he received an offer to work without me. We both declined.

Years have passed and we have both grown older. Our needs and those of our families have significantly increased. Back when we were still in college, we dreamed of retiring in a farm where it would be easy for old people to relax and enjoy the fruits of our hardwork.

At our age today, we still do not own a house, a car, a significant investment that would ensure our dream. During the last quarter of 2010, there were opportunities to join our friend in a tax haven island for a challenging position with remuneration impossible to command in Manila. He was the first one to receive an offer and we decided, as mature individuals, that it is high time for us to be serious in our dreams. But I was not lucky enough to receive an offer yet.

James and I have shared more than ten years of friendship and almost a decade of partnership. There was no major event in each other’s lives without the other. The longest time we have not been with each other was during school vacation which lasted two months tops without cellphone or Skype.

He signed a two-year contract and plans to save enough money for an investment in the Philippines which means no vacation within the first year, or even within the entire contract period. We had several months to discuss the details, the arrangements of bills, phone subscription and Skype access.

But I know, despite all the planning, this is our biggest challenge ever. We have been living our lives, scheduling our time, allotting our resources, with the other person in high consideration. How can we then adjust to this change? Who will come with me to see the latest movies or admonish me for my extravagant spending? Or to clap his hands whenever I tell my latest success story or to raise his eyebrows for my blatant lack of religiousness?

I am afraid to live each day until I get to fly and work with him or until he goes home. I am afraid I will not be strong enough. I am afraid he would soon forget me (a lot had).

But I know, believe, our love will see us through. We have been to the darkest days and emerged together, stronger. This is just another chapter in our lives that we intend not to be the last.

‘For our future’ he said. The operative word is ‘our’.


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